Peksman? (Swear?)

TGIF. It was supposed to be a night of fun and unwinding after a week at work (and extras too..hehe), but the rain wouldn’t stop from pouring in so I decided to come home early. And as it was my routine to check my phone every night before I jump on the bed, I felt nothing unusual with the names registered on the screen.. until I got to read an sms from a friend which I replied immediately (for the love of curiosity, I guess).

FRIEND : I think stress is eating me up..can I ask you a question?

Reg: What is it?

FRIEND : Am I ugly?

Reg: ………………..( I was surprised and was close to laughing hysterically that I did not reply, to avoid hurting her feeling.)

FRIEND : You have to answer.

Reg: How do you want me to answer? (Still hoping she'd recall her inquiry)

FRIEND : Honestly.

Reg: Ok. Hmnnnn. Ugly? Nope. Ordinary, maybe.What’s not ok is your height. You’re a bit short and stout. With today’s culture, the society favors those who’s got ordinary faces with brains, those with “face value”, some got attracted to “chubby pretty” looks too etc etc. In short life's not fair in terms of physique, you have to exploit on your strengths to shine. Why did you ask?

FRIEND : Am I not chuby pretty? (Really provoking me, I'm softening the blows yet she ask for more)

Reg: Nope you're not. You’re “chubby normal”..To add the hype you’re short, chubby, normal, Filipina skin.. What’s not good are those two..That’s an honest assessment, as I think that's what you are asking..

FRIEND : What are those two?

Reg: chuby and short..

FRIEND : You mean, plump?

Reg: At least it came from your own vocabulary (hehe.)

FRIEND : It’s hereditary..what’s your height anyway?

Reg: 5’5”. (ooopps..hahaha!, so what?)

FRIEND : ……………….

FRIEND : You mean, I am not attractive?

Reg: You don’t shine.. Maybe that’s the reason why you’re intelligent, I think. (Nice, to boost up her damaged morale)

FRIEND : I’m not even intelligent..hahaha!

Reg: (Nice, she is not affected) As I told you, Its my opinion so I believe that you are.

FRIEND : So..if someone doesn’t shine, she’s ugly?

Reg: (I decided not to answer because I may not be the right person to ask that inquiry so I deviced a nice exit) If I am to look for a girlfriend, you are not choice. No offense meant, I’m sure you want an honest answer.

FRIEND : I know.. Hahaha! Exactly the way I want you to perceive me…hehe…

Reg: ……………… ( I don’t know what that means… so I didn’t reply..hahaha!)

To those who got offended of above conversation my sincere apologies, its a necessary prelude to this piece.

Frankness and honesty go together. That’s one of my prerogatives in life..and above is just one of those situations wherein I vowed to show the said virtues. I never want someone to hope for something which I think isn’t existing ( esp. when it is based on my own aesthetics standards). The truth may always hurt but it will set you free..

I also try to be transparent with my job’s requirements and other business transactions. I lay it all flat on the table and deal without any hidden agenda. I give them the BUT’s ( possible failures), IF’s ( what needs to be satisfied), WHAT IF’s ( some win-win suggestions). And if I have the boldness to declare the time for something I’d do or deliver, I see to it that I will make it (and I definitely will, no matter what it takes). Or if I can’t, then I’d be brave enough to say it ahead of time to avoid complications.

Honesty also plays a very important role in every bonding. With my special relationship to somebody right now, I make it a point to be an open book to her – no skeletons in the closet. It makes us more intimate (not in the sense you probably are thinking right now..hehe) and more connected. It also deviates the possibility of having doubts.( Should I commend Tiger Woods for admitting his illicit affair with someone?). Honesty smoothens every connection as in business. It is a major ingredient to attaining success.

But does being honest to everyone and to my work make me a perfect man? Nope. For I do lie for some times too. Everybody does it, so why wont I? But only those which you call white lies. Those that you say to steer clear of hurting other people’s feelings; to stop them from worrying; to lessen the impact of a bad idea; to save someone else’s butt; to save even your own self. I think white lies are not so bad anyway.

Some people lie, steal, and cheat everytime they get the chance, some only on occasion, some hardly ever, and some never at all. The real question should be, “How honest I am?” .